Are much younger men more likely to go for older women?

[vita]

I have a theory about men and age...

Of course, it could be b-o-l-l-o-c-k-s in which case I'm sure you'll tell me and, of course, there are always exceptions to every generalisation..but...

I wonder whether much younger men - late teenage or men in their 20s - are more open about their desires towards older women while men in their early 30s are more self-conscious about getting "older" themselves and are less up for the 10-20 plus age gap. Perhaps having an older woman lover reminds them of their own descent towards getting older whereas, for a younger man, age is not yet such a sensitive issue

Am particularly interested in the opinions of the men on this one.

[jasonm519]

I mean, that's possible and an intresting way to look at it. Not sure if you knew it, but a few studies have shown that men are attracted to women that look like or remind them of thier mothers, which, could be the reason for being attracted to older women. Compliment or creepy, you decide.

[valerie]

Jason, I don't find that creepy at all. Theoretically, the reverse is true for women, and I doubt it has much to do with actual physical resemblance as just certain qualities that we admire in the opposite sex parent OR whoever was our role model as a child. I looked up to my younger brothers, so they were my personal role models. Nothing's set in stone...I'm just thinking that's the reason for my preference...and I emphasize the word "PREFERENCE" as opposed to just some crisis I'm going through, like some sort of sad attempt to recapture youth. LOL

[jasonm519]

haha. I don't think it's creepy and you explained it really well.

[seagreen]

Actually, I have this theory that it has more to do with goddess worship...

A longing to have a relationship with older women may be very appropriate for the much younger & inexperienced single young man. It can be very good for him to receive the kind of nurturing that we can give him.

Goddess worship comes in many forms, though. Men going to strip clubs is also another way to worship yet another manifestation of the goddess.

[stout890]

Originally Posted by seagreen

Actually, I have this theory that it has more to do with goddess worship...

A longing to have a relationship with older women may be very appropriate for the much younger & inexperienced single young man. It can be very good for him to receive the kind of nurturing that we can give him.

Goddess worship comes in many forms, though. Men going to strip clubs is also another way to worship yet another manifestation of the goddess.

wow well put! i believe it develops younger men into much better lover's and partner's. iv never heard it put as goddess worship but in a round about way we do see our cougars as a dominant figure, at least i do. and basically i agree.


jason i agree as well, i almost said it earlier but you had the stones to do it lol. but basically yes it true the last relationship with a cougar was like that she was almost a second mother to me. and i have no sexual attraction with my own mother at all. i cant think of any good ways of explaining it but i know what you mean, and now i know that its not just me and i dont have to worry about saying it. i don't feel its creepy either i just can be self conscious at times and didn't want to deal with the remarks i could have got.

[houstoncougar]

I do think it's more of a goddess or woman worshipping for some guys who are truly into older women all the way around. For some of the others who are not into it for just sex or who start out that way but end up in a relationship I have found for me it has been more of a mentor type of thing. I was just telling someone that a guy I dated about 4 years ago on and off for a year is finishing up college (which I talked him into sticking with and even gave advice on a major) which he took) called and asked if he could use me for a personal reference and thanked me profusely for being such a huge positive influence on his life. I have stayed friends with the younger guys I have dated seriously over the last 7 years and I love hearing how they are doing and what paths their lives have taken.

[seagreen]

Originally Posted by houstoncougar

I do think it's more of a goddess or woman worshipping for some guys who are truly into older women all the way around. For some of the others who are not into it for just sex or who start out that way but end up in a relationship I have found for me it has been more of a mentor type of thing. I was just telling someone that a guy I dated about 4 years ago on and off for a year is finishing up college (which I talked him into sticking with and even gave advice on a major) which he took) called and asked if he could use me for a personal reference and thanked me profusely for being such a huge positive influence on his life. I have stayed friends with the younger guys I have dated seriously over the last 7 years and I love hearing how they are doing and what paths their lives have taken.

You and I have much in common, houstoncougar.

[valerie]

Originally Posted by houstoncougar

I do think it's more of a goddess or woman worshipping for some guys who are truly into older women all the way around. For some of the others who are not into it for just sex or who start out that way but end up in a relationship I have found for me it has been more of a mentor type of thing. I was just telling someone that a guy I dated about 4 years ago on and off for a year is finishing up college (which I talked him into sticking with and even gave advice on a major) which he took) called and asked if he could use me for a personal reference and thanked me profusely for being such a huge positive influence on his life. I have stayed friends with the younger guys I have dated seriously over the last 7 years and I love hearing how they are doing and what paths their lives have taken.

Of course I know you are keeping in touch with only the ones that treated you well for however long it lasted. I'm often curious about how a couple of my boys are doing, but I don't want them to think I'm making some desperate attempt to hold on to them. It's over and done...we BOTH grew as a result of the relationship. There was only one I might find easy to contact because I was never "in love" with him....and that's one of the many reasons I broke it off. I'm not hating any of them....just burned the bridge so I could move on. We all have our ways of doing the latter. I guess that was off the subject Vita, but SHE started it! <pointing at Houston> LOL

[houstoncougar]

sorry you know it's just my adhd kicking in and my thoughts just go astray!