how'd it all start?

[bighaener]

Just out of curiosity and wanting to start some dialogue... Was there an initial concious moment in which you realized you prefer young men? Also, how did it start? A one night stand, a fantasy, a simple crush, whatever...

It was never a conscious decision for me. There was no dawn of reckoning. It was just a law of attraction that I never denied. My childhood sweetheart was a year younger than me....hardly an age gap even at 20, when I married him and he was 19. After that the age gap just got wider and wider. I still passed for a teenager at 30, so I was dating guys in their mid-twenties and younger. When I passed 30, all the guys I dated were at LEAST 7 years younger, and up to 35 years younger more recently. I'm trying to narrow that gap a bit these days! LOL

[firefly3x]

My first time being a cougar was on the bus when i sat next to this cute guy. We had a conversation and agreed to meet a few days later and 'do it'. Its because i asked him questions and he told me that he doesn't have any girlfriend and that kinda stuffs and suddenly i wanted to show him my 'assets'.

Its just brief and i felt kinda guilty at first (asians are not really open minded people). I even refused to give my contacts to him, and so i never see him again. When i went back home, i thought, heck, i really enjoyed myself (like 4th of July, as some of u said here)..so i began to search on the internet articles about younger men and older women until i came to this cougar site (and i joined).

I had cougared yesterday for my second time. Its quite easy as so many people are willing. I expect more to come in the future.

[whillow]

I have always looked younger than I really am and because of that, have always attracted younger men. I have dated very few men who were older than me. I pretty much prefer men from 30 to 45. A little older if they look and act younger than their real age.

[cynders]

Well for me it was because every man that I encountered in life growing up that was older than me did me wrong and hurt me, so I just have always been attracted to younger guys. Even when I was 17yrs old I was dating a 14 yr old. So its pretty much been my whole life that I have only been interested in younger guys. Jump ahead 25 yrs later and I'm still dating "only" younger guys and have never dated anyone older than me to this date!

[niall]

How'd it all begin? Well...my story has been something of a complicated but interesting journey...

Ask your average YM who likes older women and he'll usually say something like "Older women are more mature, they know what they want, don't play games..." etc. There's obviously a lot of men who have a "thing" for older women.

But I'm not one of them. I'm a little different. Allow me to explain...

I don't particularly have a "thing" for older women per se; by that I mean I don't prefer them exclusively. I've dated women my own age and even younger.

BUT...you might say I DO have a "thing" for older women who like younger guys, or at least open to the idea of one as a partner Older women who are willing to date younger guys definitely pique my interest, even more so if they're enthusiatic about it! Here's why:

1. It tells me she's open minded, which is a very attractive quality to me. I like someone who can think outside the box.

2. It tells me she's self-assured and not concerned in the slightest about what others might think. She follows her passions and doesn't deny them. Even though OW/YM relationships are becoming more common, the fact is that most women probably still wouldn't consider a younger guy. Is that because they're not interested? Maybe. However I strongly suspect that many more would really like to but are just too afraid of what others might think. And there's a lot to be said for a woman who's willing to be brave and follow her heart despite what others may think.

So there you have it...older women per se don't interest me, but those who are into younger guys will always spark my interest! And for me being open to them broadens my dating possibilties considerably, which is always a plus!

[martinix3]

All my life i felt somewhat out of place. I really fell like i am way to mature for my own good. I always held great conversations with older people throughout my life. I remember being in 6th grade going to an after school honors class, and there i was talking to the teacher about her relationships and what plans she had in life. I always got along with teachers in general because i could relate to some of the things they talked about. I was never a ladies man, and i was surprised at how easy girls my age seemed to be. They seemed to want a more physical relationship, whereas i would rather get to know them and talk.

In high school, i was a 16 year old sophomore and i really fell in love with this 19 year old senior. we sat next to each other in chemistry class and we always flirted. It was pretty evident that i liked her and even the teacher used to tell us to focus on him and not each other. I was going to ask her out, but one day she told me, "you know, if you were a year older, i would marry you". Then and there i felt that i didnt want to ruin such a precious relationship and i didnt go through with it. now i know the age difference wasn't that big, but it helped cement the "older women" philosophy.

[buni]

I've always been attracted to younger guys, but didn't really start thinking about dating one until I got the hugest crush on a buddy of mine....He and I had a lot of online fun...telephone fun and all that and from then on I decided that I would try talking to and getting to know more younger men and I realized that even though some younger men are not 'mature' they are more likely to talk to me about anything and everything, I'm not judged by them..they accept me more and I actually have more in common with younger men as far as music and stuff goes...

[martinix3]

that's cool! you sound really nice buni! i wish i was a lot closer to arkansas