The Dynamics of Cougar/Cub relationships

[floridasunshine]

I have always been attracted to younger but just recently decided to explore this desire. Finding this site is great because I have a few questions about the dynamics of what motivates younger men to find an older woman.

This post below seems to be typical of what I have found during my search.

Originally Posted by lunamor

"being with a older women...helps u to b more experienced n skilled inna d bedroom"

uhm, yeah, that's what older women are here for - to help a younger guy sharpen his skills, and build up his lover resume' *cough*

My experience is that it is almost always sexually motivated and it is rare to find those young men that actauully seek a relationship.


So my question is Ladies: What has been your experience on what themen that come to this site and others like it as far as what they are seeking?

[startpoint]

Hello Floridasunshine,
I assure you that not all young men want to find an older women purley for sex. I myself am 31 and in love with a 45 year old because of her personality and warmth, humor. I would prefer to meet an older woman for companionship and inteligent coversation. I am sure that the bedrom side would develop at its own pace and besides I perfer lovemaking to sex. Keep looking and I hope you find what you seek or maybe if you are in the UK, call in to see me!

[andy1338]

well if you just mean sex i don't think i could do that to be honest. Just sex arrangement not sex . But if she has children and doesn't want anymore and you really want children it probubly wont be a match made in heaven but it could be something special.

[lunamor]

Floridasunshine, I think that not all, but certainly most guys on these sites are looking for something light: sexual fun, experience, amusement, entertainment, etc. If you have a "sex-as-sport" mentality or attitude, you'll find lots of matches! If you want something that goes a bit deeper, the statistical probability drops a lot. Having said that, I DID meet a very sweet, loving, incredibly sexy, and even handsome young guy on a similar site last year, and it turned into a love story. So anything's possible, and in the end it's really a lot like fishing: it takes time, patience and optimism. Good luck!

[dill]

I'm definitely not in it for the sex, I want a real relationship. Sex with no real emotional connection is a waste. I need to feel love for someone.

[jc60616]

I agree with Tarni and Lunamor it takes time and patience to discover the "quality" man. There are plenty in quantity who are scoping out these sites to ehance their sexual experience with an older woman.

[ares9]

Originally Posted by floridasunshine

My experience is that it is almost always sexually motivated and it is rare to find those young men that actauully seek a relationship.

Ok so I'm not a lady, but I thought I'd comment anyway... I think you're shooting for too young, not sure of your age, but try dating an older cub who's been out on his own for a while.

[cleoquel]

Dear Florida

I wrote a long answer but hit a wrong key that didnt' seem to save, so

short answer

INternet= weekend fun

and those you meet and pursue accidentally = more prone to at least having a friendship/relationship. I met my first cub when he mowed my lawn, had our first experiences together, and we talked about me being on internet dating sites. He said "go for it!" He was actually concerned also about the using-player mentality of those on the net, while still supportive of me trying to date younger men. Me at 35 was getting an 18 year old to help me read internet profiles/dates-and we got closer because of it.

They say cougars prey on packs of wolves (friends of cubs)--, which I didn't think was true, but my first cub introduced me willingly to younger friends he WANTED me to meet. And when he did introduce me, we talked openly about our past experiences, our feelings at the time, and how the experience increased both of our confidence.

BTW, almost a year later, yes, I'm still best friends with the first cub, even with his now-fiancee (and yes, she knows too). They are at my house a few times a week, as part of my family--and still supporting my dating/desires for younger men.

[lunamor]

"try dating an older cub who's been out on his own for a while"

Yeah, I second that.

[houstoncougar]

met and had a date with a 25 year old who had been on his own since graduating from high school. I figured he knew a little bit about life too since he also had a child. Boy was I wrong and if it wasn't still so fresh in my mind I'd tell you all about the date from hell.