The Dynamics of Cougar/Cub relationships

[piper]

Lol, well i'm glad everyone can agree that my head is on my shoulders. wetnwild, i'm 22 turning 23 in few months, and to be honest i didn't put any thought at all into what i wrote. I just read something I didn't agree with and responded to it. I'm very outspoken and opinionated so this is like second nature and besides, one saying that i really like goes; If you don't speak from the heart, don't speak. but that's just me.

[wannadateu]

Floridasunshine,

There are number of reasons young man to date older woman:

1. The fact that she is still sexy. I would not be dating older woman who doesnt look good and sexy.
2. The fact that "cougars" made their best to be attractive.
3. Life experience. The relationship is usually not only sex. I prefer to date women and speak to them on various themes.
4. The bedroom experience - The relationship is sex as well.
5. Their willingness to live like they are 25-30.

[emoregan]

Guys are here for different reasons, your reasons are different from mine, you and the other. We are not from thesame family so our motives are totally different. But one thing for sure is that majority of the guys are here cos they believe the cougar are more caring, understanding and most especially more experience when it comes to relationship. thats my point of view

[jules60]

Originally Posted by wannadateu

Floridasunshine,

There are number of reasons young man to date older woman:

1. The fact that she is still sexy. I would not be dating older woman who doesnt look good and sexy.
2. The fact that "cougars" made their best to be attractive.
3. Life experience. The relationship is usually not only sex. I prefer to date women and speak to them on various themes.
4. The bedroom experience - The relationship is sex as well.
5. Their willingness to live like they are 25-30.

Nice to see this - when you speak in relationships, it makes one feel appreciated. In my experience, older women and younger men seem to make a fairly compatible match and both make more of an effort to impress and please each other in all areas.

[crimsonak]

Originally Posted by warwagon86

i don't believe its fair to label everyone with that brush (in reference to the first post) but when your younger yo do not think about relationships

i mean im 23 turning 24 and i have had my fair share of heart breaks and one nighters so to be fair i would think alot more about relationships and possibilities now than i would have when i was 18.

to me your age shouldn't matter its the chemistry between you and the other person - looks, age, religion all that should be thrown out the window and you should go with your feelings. not prejudices set forward by others.

While this matters isn;t it also true that when you first meet someone sexual chemistry and attaraction is all you have to base?
I mean granted in the long run Personality is what really matters but for me atleast I could never love someone I don't find attractive.
I certainly wouldnt approach someone I don't find attractive either.

The unfortunate reality is (atleast the way I see it) is you don't know people until you speak to them, and you don't speak to them unless you're attracted to them. [Sometimes in rare cases this doesnt occur but.. majorativly speaking]. What it ends up causing is sex ends up being a part of whether you work, even from the very beginning, even if it's just sexual attraction. Whether you continue to work is based on whether you can see more than just that sexual attraction in the person.

[mizbehavin]

I have to disagree with you, Crimson, at least personally. Sexual chemistry and attraction are not what I base the beginning of a relationship on. I base it on intelligence, how they carry and portray themselves, and many other things first. I also do not base "attractive" on physical looks. The media has us so screwed up on that anyway.

Not talking to people because you are not attracted to them kindof makes you shallow, I think. I'll talk to anyone, doesn't matter what they look like because they are people. Have you seen "Shallow Hal" btw? It's the insides of people that count, the outside is just a package.

And what the hell does sex have to do with anything working or not? If you're basing a relationship, any kind of relationship, on sex..it is bound to fail. There is so much more than that.

[crimsonak]

Originally Posted by mizbehavin

I have to disagree with you, Crimson, at least personally. Sexual chemistry and attraction are not what I base the beginning of a relationship on. I base it on intelligence, how they carry and portray themselves, and many other things first. I also do not base "attractive" on physical looks. The media has us so screwed up on that anyway.

Not talking to people because you are not attracted to them kindof makes you shallow, I think. I'll talk to anyone, doesn't matter what they look like because they are people. Have you seen "Shallow Hal" btw? It's the insides of people that count, the outside is just a package.

And what the hell does sex have to do with anything working or not? If you're basing a relationship, any kind of relationship, on sex..it is bound to fail. There is so much more than that.

How can you know the intelligence of a person until you approach them though?
Does this mean you approach anyone and everyone?
Surely how attractive someone is has to be at a basis in some point of any "pull" that you have towards someone.

Granted like I said it isnt always a very important thing. but does it not always exist and is it always (to some degree, atleast for me) existant, especially in the early stages and as time goes on becomes less and less relevant.

and you might have misunderstood my sex point, what I meant is literally that sex is a part of a relationship not that it is something that a relationship depends on necessarily but it is however something that defines a relationship. How you and the other person intertwine.