Now what do I do?

[blueize]

Lose the loser!

The more you love yourself, the better chance you'll have to find someone who values your time. Decent guys know better than to brag. They always try to sound as nonchalant as possible. NONE brag to women about other women. He's extremely insecure and immature. He's lying or embellishing a lame one-night-stand.

I think you should really examine your attraction to this unattractive guy. There are some men in the world who have great attributes: they're considerate, mature, attractive, responsible; they LIKE women. For your own self-esteem and welfare, try focussing on someone worth your time.

Someone away from work is best. I hope everything goes better for you next month.

[blueize]

I reread my last post. I didn't mean for it to sound like you need therapy or anything.
Regarding his behavior: He'd responsible for it, and I'm sure you didn't see it coming. You did mention him being insecure in an earlier post. My best guess is that his insecurity (and fear) has manifested itself as extreme defensiveness.

If he ever mentions other women to you again, you could suggest that she sounds like the perfect match for him and cheerfully encourage him to pursue her: 'the beautiful drunk' or whoever. This will probably get you off the hook for future temper tantrums, cause I think you hit the nail on the head with that remark.

I really do hope you find someone else to focus on. I'm getting ready to hit on my chosen victim and if that doesn't work well... c'est la vie.

[cougar1970]

Thanks Blueize
No I am a pretty grounded person..I have had therapy..many years ago..my problem is being attracted to men who are just not good for me like the one in question
But the more I think about it the more you are right: he's immature and childish and obviously doesnt know how to treat a real woman .
Peace
Lori

[scotsman1981]

I had a similar experience except i was the younger guy, I was 24 and was put in charge of the store but was so attracted to a supervisor who was 46. We flirted loads and i mean loads but i couldnt get the courage to do anything as c'mon shes 46 she wont be interested in me! I was extremely intimidated even though i am confident in everything else.

Finally she asked me for a lift home and she asked me if wanted to grab a drink sometime which we did, however i was such an idiot and so self concious in the bar i ended up being cold and probably rude. She stuck with me, why i dont know and offered me a drink in her flat. That made the difference i relaxed was myself and got chatting to her more in depth.

We had a great 2 year relationship and if it wasnt for her understanding and patience i would have still been flirting with her in work and doing nothing about it. Hope it goes well x

[sudojudo]

There is a hell of a difference in acting cold and rude out of fright and being outright belligerent. Cougar1970, even if this guy is just making stuff up because he doesn't know how to act, you can count on him jeopardizing your employment because he can't handle himself. Talk to yourself and replay the way he made you feel. How is that kind of talk going to make you feel if you guys get close? AND please don't except any talk from him about "how he never acts like that, don't know what got into me". Would you except that kind of treatment from anybody else? Sometimes a cub will act in an immature way, but a creep is a creep. RUN COUGAR RUN.

[cougar1970]

Basically
It comes down to the fact that I am very often attracted to men who act this way, they are overpowering (or want to be), they TRY to make themselves look really good by talking about the "many women in their lives" (supposedly). In fact, they only make themselves look desperate. This cub and when I look at the situation and I am reminded by how he acts, he is just a CUB who desperately wants to be a man, but doesnt know how. My work is to break free of this pattern and know and understand that I deserve so much more than this...
Part of me feels sorry for him, but I know for sure (no offense to anyone) that I dont want to be in a relationship with a child. I want someone who can roll with the punches but who can still treat me with the dignity and respect that I deserve. All relationships are give and take but I refuse to put up with someone who thinks he can only take without doing a little bit of giving....I also found out that he will be going away for about 5 days ( I am so relieved) so I am hoping that things will settle down by the time he comes back and we can return to a more civilized working relationship.

Peace to all who gave me advice, Best in everyone's search for LOVE!