1st time cougar

[anyonebuthim]

I am starting to talk to a past coworker who is 20 years younger... we flirted at work but i never knew he was into me until recently. We have been chatting on and off and texting... he wanted to "take meout" but now he wants to "hang out" at my place for the fist time. But I am getting the feeling he may be embarrassed cause of our age difference... how would I know? How do I know if he;s really into to me... not use to the guy so much younger than I? Please give your input whether good or bad!
A

[violet]

We all have to draw our own line. I was in contact with a young man who wanted to meet me at my home, but I didn't agree to this and suggested meeting at a cafe. He cancelled that date, and then another one, so I gave up on him. I figure if he only wants to meet me in private and not in public, then it will always be that way, just a secret thing on the side. Not what I'm into.

[cherryaa]

if he only wants to stay in, give him a miss, plenty of guys happy to be out !

[shortcake]

If he seems a bit uncomfortable about the age and he wants to hang out at your place, I think you should be a little weary. Plenty of time to hang out at your place after you two get to know each other better. How he acts in a public outing with you will let you know how he feels about you. In my opinion of course.

[mizbehavin]

Well, just to "test the waters" so to speak, why don't you suggest going to a new restaurant somewhere, or suggest one of your favorites that he hasn't been to yet? Don't assume it's because he's uncomfortable until you know for sure

[lunamor]

Thieves, rapists, serial killers ... the guy is a stranger, it's a really bad idea to bring him into your home before knowing him better!

[houstoncougar]

it has been my experience that when a young man says he wants to hang out he is hoping that the hanging out turns into making out and then into sex. Sorry but letting a guy come over without ever taking you out invites all kinds of suppositions on his part not withstanding the fact that you are putting your own life at risk.

[bayridgebabe]

Ladies, she did say she knew him from work, as he is a past co-worker. I don't think her safety would really be @ stake here. However, I do believe that he's looking for the easy way out by not taking you out. Yes, he is definitely looking to make out & then hoping you will have sex with him. Unless that's what you are also looking for DON'T DO IT. Make him take you out, even if it's just for a cup of coffee & a doughnut. You can always go to your home another time.

[phxgirl1]

Yup, out in public tells the tale. Why be with someone if they're embarrassed to be seen with you? Not good for the self esteem and will only bring you down.

[lunamor]

Oh you're right CJ, they DO know each other -- I got off on a tangent! Still, I agree with everyone about his reluctance to be out in public, I wouldn't accept it.